In some cultures, many people believe you should stay a virgin until you get married. Some young people want this themselves, others don’t. What do you think about this?
What is virginity?
‘Being a virgin’ means that you have never had sex. Opinions differ as to what constitutes ‘sex’ exactly. Are you a virgin if you’ve never been kissed? And what about oral sex? What ‘being a virgin’ means exactly, depends on your personal opinion, your religion and your culture.
Lots of people believe that a woman who is still a virgin bleeds the first time she has penetrative sex, because the vaginal corona (also called the hymen) tears. But this isn’t true. The corona does not usually cover the whole vagina. It consists of thin folds of mucous tissue just inside the vaginal opening, which a penis can easily slide past. So most women don’t bleed when having first-time sex.
Some young people would like to remain virgins until they are married. Other young people have sexual experiences before they marry. How do you make a choice that feels right for you? Maybe you already know what you want to do. Are you unsure? Read more about making choices.
If you are expected to be a virgin when you marry, the wedding night is often nerve-racking. You’ve probably fantasised about it at some time and you are very curious. But you don’t really know what’s going to happen, and exactly what you are supposed to do. Was your first time not what you expected? Making love usually gets better as you get to know each other.