When you find out
Not everyone is happy being gay, lesbian or bisexual. It can be very confusing. Perhaps you feel like you are the only one. Or you hear people around you saying weird things about gay, lesbian and bisexual people. It can be good to know you’re not the only one. Find people you can talk to about it, and who know how you feel.
What can you do?
- Read personal experience stories by young people who are already out of the closet. It’s good to read about how other people deal with it.
- Talk to people you trust and who you feel comfortable with.
- Talk about it online.
How do you react?
- People around you assume you’re straight. To them, being straight is the norm. It's true there are more straight people than gay, lesbian or bi people. But you could say: that doesn't mean straight is normal and that you are abnormal.
- There are gay, lesbian and bi people all over the world.
- Being gay, lesbian or bi doesn't make you one of nature’s mistakes. Even animals show homosexual behaviour in the wild.
- Religious people may reject homosexuality, but that doesn’t apply to everyone who is religious. Attitudes towards gay, lesbian and bi people often differ within a single religion.
- Gay, lesbian and bi people are just as diverse as straight people are. They might tend to be more feminine, or more masculine, in the same way straight people do. If you’re not a classic example of a woman or girl − or of a man or boy − that’s perfectly fine. Everyone’s different. The most important thing is to be yourself.
Who do you fancy?
Am I gay, lesbian, straight, or bisexual? The answer isn't always that simple. That's because your sexual preference is not always 100% clear.
Coming out
Coming out means telling people you are gay, lesbian or bisexual. Who do you tell and do you always have to tell someone? When is the best time to do it?
Where do you find others?
Your first contact with other gay, lesbian or bisexual people is often a terrific moment: you realise you're not alone! But where do you find these people?
In love. What next?
Hoe weet je of degene op wie je verliefd bent op jou valt? Het is lastiger als je homo, lesbisch of bi bent. Zeker als je hier zelf niet open over bent.
Are you looking for help?
If something is bothering you, talking about it can be a relief. You can do that with someone you know, with a social worker or anonymously at Sense.info.
Sex
How do you make love when you're gay, lesbian or bisexual? It starts the same as it does with heterosexual sex. What is different? Read about it here.